So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Randomize
