I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
