I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
