i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
