trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
FUCK WHALES
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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