there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize
