are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize
