my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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