maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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