Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Randomize
