I got chris browned last night
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
