The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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