clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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