Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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