Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
The uberlube is also flammable
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
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