ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
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