yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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