I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
