these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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