You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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