i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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