im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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