My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
