yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
