Heybabeimwearingurpanties
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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