glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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