Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
She told me I should be a condom model.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
