maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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