Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
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