Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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