I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
