I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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