I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
