Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
