She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Randomize
