I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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