If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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