just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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