He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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