Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
