she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
