just come out here and I will go home with you...
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
They took my balls.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
