Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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