before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
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