Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
