hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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