angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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