there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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