watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
