She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
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